Summer 2008
Fulfilling the Desire of His Heart
Nancy Cason

One day during prayer, I asked the Father, "What is foremost on your heart?" He answered in a way that could not have been clearer to me, "My burden and concern is the same as yours - My children are not walking with Me as they should."

Having three Spirit-filled children who are not serving God, I knew His heartache. I have prayed many hours for my children, not that they would become richer or greater, but the Lord knew that my greatest desire was for them to serve Him.

There was no problem convincing my children that they needed salvation. They accepted Jesus readily. Also, they agreed that they needed the infilling of the Holy Spirit. But when it came to the cross, their denying "self" and their own ways, there was a "mule stubbornness" that came upon them, as on all too many of the Lord's children.

Our dying on a cross is not received like salvation, or the infilling of the Holy Spirit and gifts, which are freely given. There is a price that must be paid in giving up our life for His. Therefore, when the time arrives to surrender our all, place ourselves on the cross, and abandon our selfish will, we balk and begin to back away from God.

On March 16, 1970, at the age of 40, Jesus filled me with the Holy Spirit. Of course, like many in those days, I thought I had arrived. Little did I know that this is where it begins.

Like all (supposedly) good charismatics, I joined the circuit. I went to meetings, heard testimonies, fellowshipped, made and compared notes. I prayed diligently and sought out those to whom I might "minister." They were everywhere, looking for answers from each other and getting into trouble with "kitchen prophecies." Some were damaged irreparably by chasing demons in everyone and everything.

At this time, those who were preaching "sanctification" were also preaching no makeup, no jewelry, etc. and the new "Holy Ghost" people were not responding. We were looking for the power, miracle gifts and healing, feeling that this was the ultimate.

We were not taught that the "Holy Spirit and Fire" was to burn up the dross and purify us so we could be useful in the Kingdom. Did we ever get that wrong.

Twenty years later, the Lord is loudly, clearly saying, "Have you run out of your own steam yet? Do you realize that nothing done in your own zeal will last? Are you ready now to receive understanding of what I expect from you?"

Some are responding, but many have given up. This is the burden on the heart of our Heavenly Father - all the thousands who were washed into the Body of Christ, but have gone back to their old ways.

Being Spirit baptized, but not understanding that there is a further work the Lord seeks to accomplish in their lives for a higher purpose, they (including my three children) have pushed Him down and covered Him over. My prayer, like David's for these is, "Create in (them) a clean heart and renew a right spirit within (them). Restore unto (them) the joy of their salvation."

The Lord never told us to run on our own. His intention was for the Holy Spirit to teach us about Jesus; to conform us into His image, to renew our minds and transform us into His likeness. It takes trials, testings, and tribulations, "for the perfecting of the saints."

At this time, the Lord is sovereignly turning us around, changing us, and revealing Christ in us, that He might be revealed through us. Many are hearing Him, others are not; but they will hear, some from a deep, dark place of despair. He is allowing, in His mercy, some to be dealt with severely in order to bring forth the "gold" of His nature within them.

"I counsel thee to buy of me gold tried in the
fire, that thou mayest be rich; and white raiment,
that thou mayest be clothed, and that the shame
of thy nakedness do not appear; and anoint thine
eyes with eyesalve, that thou mayest see. As many
as I love, I rebuke and chasten: be zealous
therefore, and repent" Rev 3:18-19.

"Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone" John 12:24a. We must die to our own ways, deny self, and abandon all that is less than His desire and purpose for us.

How glorious it is when we yield to the work of the cross and are resurrected into His presence and purpose.